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S.A.D.
2005-04-06

I really should be the poster child for SAD. A couple of days of lovely weather, light at 6.30pm and my outlook is so much better. I am joking more, I am dancing more (helped by the fact that the boss is away this week and hence the radio is on at work constantly), laughing and smiling more.

My dad sent me a link to a Croatian music site and listening to the music I became extremely homesick, but not in the deep sad way that usually happens. More a reminiscent way. All of us dancing in the living room and kitchen to Croatian music. My mum with her apron on making lunch or baking a cake taking a turn with me, or jokingly yelling at me and my sister to stop being so silly, my sister and I doubled over with laughter over the silliness we have created, my dad laughing, cracking jokes doing his dance moves which were very much like Napoleonís in his dance scene from the fabulously brilliant movie Napoleon Dynamite.

Itís evenings like this that having friends to sit outside and enjoy the spring weather with, have a few drinks and basically shoot the shit is what itís all about. But alas, I find myself enjoying the weather, music and wine with myself and shooting the one sided shit with you. But you know, itís good, itís all good. I feel so much better. I want to get out of bed in the morning, I want to go to work, I want to see what the day has in store for me, even if it is no different from the day before.

I would never have truly believed the extent weather has on my mood. The New England winterís are too harsh on me. They are actually bad for my health, I put on a tonne of weight. I sleep 18 hours a day, I miss work, I push away anyone who dares to get close to me, but come spring I am a new person. Honestly you wouldnít recognise me. I am half my size, I am laughing, I have a positive outlook and I donít want to lock myself out from the world. It really never ceases to amaze me the flip in my personality when the clocks go forward that one hour.

I canít ever remember being this affected back home. True we donít have 6 months of winter, where the temperature doesnít drop below zero and where you have to travel for a couple of hours to find snow. So yeah while I love so many things about New England, namely the Cape in the summer time and the beautiful foliage during autumn, I cannot handle the winters. So anyone out there that is just as affected by the winter as I am, you should definitely move to Australia, I know I will return there. You can stay with me and my folks until you find your own place, we will be more than happy to have you stay. Just beware, you will receive raw, uncensored, unabashed European hospitality, which in all honesty (just between you and me) is brilliant!

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